The Sky Of The Astronomy Tower
by PoisonParadiseExpress
Summary: "You know nothing about me Lysander; Nothing!"I snapped. "Lily-" he started, looking into my eyes. I looked away. "Lily look at me." He held my chin softly and turned my head so I was facing him."Lily, I know everything about you; EVERYTHING, about the person you are NOW.All you have to know is… I am not blind; I can see you, even better than you can imagine..."


A/N: I wrote this for ginny. jal. harry's writing contest. I hope you like it! Thanks to iheartweasleytwins for letting me know about it, and a big thanks to the people who read this!

**THE SKY OF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER**

I was staring at the night sky, enchanted by the stars and the moonlight. I sniffed, wiped my eyes and took in the cool air. The sky had a way of soothing me, cheering me up when I was upset. I sniffed again, sighing as I sat down on the ground.

I ruined the Quidditch match. I got hit by the bludger one of the Slytherin beaters sent towards me while I was busy yelling at our keeper, and I missed the snitch. I ran away from the crowd as soon as the game was over and hurried up the stairs of the astronomy tower, hiding myself from everybody, even my friends. I was ashamed of them; ashamed of all I had done… it was my entire fault.

"You idiot…" I muttered to myself angrily. "You're not worth it… they'll replace you, switch you…"

"OH BLOODY HELL!" I almost shouted, unaware of the fact that it was almost midnight and I had no permission to be here. Then, fresh tears started rolling down my cheeks. I covered my face with my hands, my red hair falling around my face and hiding it like curtains.

I raised my head after a while, dabbing my eyes and nose with my sleeves. _This wasn't the main reason of my anger and sadness; it was __**him**__ who made things so complicated._ A part of me didn't mind my new feelings and the things I did. It liked it even, and wanted me to keep it up. It thought it all worked for him somehow. Another part of me however, was afraid. It told me to stop, think twice, hide everything, leave whenever he comes around… because the things I felt and did around one particular person were not the same as before. I guess the second part of me just wasn't used to it yet. Everybody loses sometimes… everybody screws things up. It wasn't a crime to make a mistake; we would flatten Ravenclaw in the next match and everybody would forget about my mistake. But deep inside, in the place where I kept my most personal and dark secrets, I knew I didn't care if they forgot or not. Yes, Quidditch _was_ the most important thing in my life and the thing I cared about most, but my heart didn't love it like a person; I mean come on, you can't fall in love with a sport!

_I had to be honest with myself… I needed to._

I was fed up. I was tired of running around and acting as if everything was perfect and he was just a good friend. I wasn't sure if my friends knew, but I didn't care. I had been obvious enough through the last month; I had to either tell him straight in the face, or try to get over him. He wasn't the kind of guy to take hints and stuff, but still, if I told him and he didn't feel the same way, the truth would hit me in the face. When I thought about it more carefully, it had already hit me quite hard enough.

Lysander Scamander didn't love me.

I had spent a big amount of time walking around with him, laughing at his stupidest jokes- which I found surprisingly funny- and talking to him. I used any single chance I found for touching or holding his hand, wishing he would feel something, but he didn't; not at all. And the times when I thought he was going to tell me he liked me or something, he only told me I was a really great friend, and he liked spending time with me a lot. _Yeah, thank you very much for the nice comment. _But I didn't say anything; I just smiled, tried to be sweet, play cool, and I told him I liked him a lot too. Well, I didn't lie after all.

I had drowned in my angry thoughts when I heard hurried footsteps storming up the stairs.

_Oh no, this was a prefect for sure; all I needed was Gryffindor to lose some points and this would be the best day of my life._

I gathered myself up, quickly wiped my eyes, and cleared my voice quietly. Nobody was allowed to see Lily Potter's tears; NOBODY. I held my breath as the steps became louder, closer, and when the person reached the top- the place I was sitting- my heart skipped a beat.

In front of me stood Lysander Scamander.

"I- knew- I- would find you- here-" he panted, clutching his stomach. He took a deep breath and his breathing went back to normal. "You always come here when you're upset."

"How do you know?" I asked, slightly surprised. My friends did know the fact that I needed to be alone when I was down, but nobody knew I came HERE.

_He follows you… He feels it too… You just have to go for it… Tell him. _Whispered the positive part of me excitedly. _Be careful… excuse yourself and go away… shut your mouth… don't even think about telling him!_ Shouted the negative part worryingly. My brain asked me to wait for his answer in a wise and logical voice. I obeyed.

"Have you been… crying?" he asked in a surprised or even shocked voice.

"No. No, I haven't." I snapped, aware of the embarrassing fact that my voice revealed everything. He stepped forward, walking closer to take a better look at my face; and for the first time in my life, I wished the moon wasn't so shiny.

"You HAVE cried." He informed me. Yes, there was no need to deny anything anymore; he had found out the truth. Strangely though, he wasn't laughing or making fun of me. His eyes didn't widen with surprise, they wore some kind of… sad look… and I didn't know how to react or what to say.

_Tell him; just SAY IT! _Roared the positive half. _Beware… be quiet! _Warned the other. _What are you waiting for? He's too close, kiss him and he'll know! _Protested the positive half angrily.

My brain calmly ordered me to wait and act logical. Again, I obeyed; because Lily Potter was always logical, ALWAYS.

Lysander sat on the ground. "Come sit with me." He invited me to join him. I did. "What made you so upset?"

He was staring in my eyes, as if he wanted to pull out the truth. My honest answer would be 'you', but another sentence came out instead: "I ruined the game. We lost, and it was my entire fault. I…" opening up alone made tears roll down my cheeks again. We were so close, and everything seemed so simple, but I couldn't… I just COULDN'T tell him. THIS was hurting me.

He put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer to him. I felt the warmth of his body through his robe, and it made me feel so pathetic. _Everything was so clear and he was just far too blind to see, far too busy to feel it… _the fury came back again; building up inside me and boiling like hot water.

"I know how you feel." He spoke in a soothing voice. "You don't. You just don't." I said stubbornly. "I know you too well!" he replied quickly, as if he was trying to make me understand.

"You know NOTHING about me!" I snapped loudly. The walls I had built around myself shattered to pieces; this was the end. I was going to let him know everything once and for all. I wouldn't tell him I love him, but everything else had to be unveiled. "The things you know are about the times when we were kids! You have to open your eyes, Lysander; the world has changed! I am NOT the same person I used to be a few years ago… you just don't know… don't understand…"

"Lily-" he started, looking into my eyes. I looked away. "Lily look at me." He held my chin ever so softly and turned my head so I was facing him. The only word I could use to describe the look in his eyes was… hurt.

"Lily, I know everything about you; EVERYTHING, about the person you are NOW. I know you have changed, so have I; but all you have to know is… I am not blind; I can see you, even better than you can imagine. I just know you too well."

"Prove it." I demanded coldly. My sixteen year old brain agreed. I needed more information… I just NEEDED to know more.

"I know you were one of those who immediately got sorted into Gryffindor; the hat barely touched your head. I know you're the only left handed girl in our house. You never eat porridge because it reminds you of a nasty prank James and Fred pulled on you when you were eight; they covered a bowl of slime with porridge. I know you care about Quidditch more than anything in the world. You sometimes feel tired of living with two completely different brothers, but you have a bit of both in you, James's humor and Albus's intelligence, so that makes you able to tolerate them… and be so special. I know you love living in a big family because it gives you the feeling of safety and protection. Lily, I know you don't like your hair and eye color because it makes you look exactly like your mother, while you want to be special. Your favorite color is blue because it reminds you of the ocean and the sky. You tell most of your secrets to your grandmother because she's the most trusted person in your life. I know you hate it that your father is the most celebrated hero in history, wondering if you will ever be as complete and noble as he is. You like autumn because the way the dry leaves dance with the cold wind amazes you and makes you feel more comfortable with your hair. You love daisies, breakfast in bed, and maroon sweaters. And… you think all the things my brother says about wrackspurts and nargles are definitely not real but you still respect everybody's ideas and beliefs…"

He locked eyes with me, holding me tighter with his arm around my shoulder, smiling lovingly.

"I also know, Lily Luna Potter, that you have the most beautiful eyes and hair in the world, because they are the things that make you stand out in a crowd. You have a smile nobody has ever had but you, and when you look into my eyes, it's like you talk to me without saying a word. I know that you never sing in front of anybody because you're ashamed to show your soft side and get hurt, but you have the most touching voice. You come to the astronomy tower when you feel down because the sky and the stars have a way of soothing you and cheering you up and it makes you feel like they can make all of your wishes come true. I also know… that I am deeply… helplessly in love with you."

And with that… he leaned in and kissed me. I gave all I had kept inside for months; love, hope, everything. Everything felt magical.

"I love you too, Lysander." I smiled heartily when his lips left mine, hugging him tightly.

I was right; the sky and the astronomy tower did have a way of cheering me up… and making my wishes come true.


End file.
